Ryan J. Allen

I am a person who believes actions speak louder than words. I am more apt to just do something rathern than talk about doing something. Sometimes these somethings are elaborate and interesting, while other times they are simple and thoughtful.

I am a problem solver; it’s what I do. I love solving problems as well–the process, the options, the outcome are all very interesting to me. Of course, I need to have some attachment to the problem for it to interest me. One couldn’t simply present me with a problem that I don’t care about and have me see it through to the end.

Sometimes, despite my love for solving problems and my drive to do rather than to say, things don’t work out the way I had originally planned. A lot of the time this doesn’t matter–things end up getting done a little differently, or at a later time. Anyone who cooks can probably fully appreciate this–sometimes things have to change based on the dynamics of what you’re doing.

Sometimes there are problems that you cannot solve; you can help the problem, but you cannot solve it. Maybe you lack the expertise, the knowledge in the field, the utilities, or the time to resolve the problem. This can be frustrating, and leave you feeling helpless. I have had this feeling many times over with Will: there’s just nothing I can do to solve his mental health problems. But I can help, and I think I do.

I think the “actions speak louder than words” mentality builds credibility. We all know someone who is “all talk”–he or she says something is going to happen and it never does. On the flip-side, hopefully we all know someone who is reliable; whose word sticks as often as the sun rises and sets. What’s interesting is that it is possible for someone in this position to start doing just by saying. “I will…” effectively turns into “I have…”. There must be a bank that you withdrawl from everytime you say “I will” in such a way, because I presume you couldn’t get away with it forever.

Random thoughts from the mind of RJ…

In other news, I picked Alex up from work yesterday evening. Our parents were out at a function so we were left to fend for ourselves. I didn’t feel like cooking so we went out for dinner. Alex picked Chez Piggy.

Our dinner was a quick and simple one. We started with the gambas al ajillo, which is shrimp fried in olive oil with garlic and chilis. The deliciousness continues even after the shrimp is gone, as the bread (Pan Chancho bread, of course) is dipped in the garlicy oil that remains. Alex had the cha gio salad, Vietnamese spring rolls (shrimp, chicken, pork) served with glass noodles, peanuts, mint, and coriander on fresh baby greens. I had the pasta du jour which was fusilli with a creamy argugula pinenut pesto.

We finished up dinner skipping dessert, as we were both too full. Dinner was very reasonably priced, and our server (Tim) was excellent. We even saw David Boyd, brother of Geoff Jeff Boyd. All in all, a great meal and an excellent choice.

Dear Readers,

Merry Christmas to you all. I have had a great weekend; from getting a ride with friend and family from Ottawa, baking with my sister, one of my favourite Christmas Eves to date, and a wonderfully relaxing Christmas morning, I have a multitude of things making me happy. It’s crazy how much I love my family; I cannot imagine what it would be like if I were to live far away.

The fun won’t stop now. I’m looking forward to Christmas dinner with much of my extended family today (I believe 15 for dinner), followed by a birthday dinner tomorrow with many of the people I cherish the most. Can you feel that? That’s the feel of someone smiling.

Merry Christmas!

Love,

The RJA

Generally speaking, I think I am a relatively relaxed person. There are times when people around me are going crazy, racing around at 100 miles per hour, and I am able to stand still. My two favourite mottos at this point in life reflect this relaxed approach to life: “it doesn’t matter”, and “everything will be fine”. I believe that this ability to be calm has even saved the life of someone I love–not to suggest that I did anything exceptional, but that it was no accident that I was in the right place at the right time. Point being: I am a calm person.

I am not always a calm person. Sometimes simple things can phase me–in fact, most of the time it’s something simple, and unexpected. I think there might even be one recurring theme that can always drive me to frustration, similar to how calling Marty McFly (Back to the Future) a “chicken” will cause him to act irrationally. Again, I can think of two extreme cases where I have been phased by something that has resulted in an overreaction of irrational behavior. Point being: I am not always a calm person.

I think more to the point, I am a thinker. I actively think a lot; I passively think even more. I imagine this is the same for a lot of people, so it’s nothing special, but it’s interesting to combine this with the aforementioned traits of myself. As a relaxed person with the “it doesn’t matter” attitude I have a great deal of control over my thinking. At anytime I can throw the thinking process into the background, if you don’t mind my computer analogy; the thought will finish sometime and it doesn’t matter when that is. This works out especially well for someone who thinks so much: when it’s time to go to bed, or focus on sometime that isn’t in my forethought, I can use job control to give myself an active console to engage in a new activity (sleep, or otherwise) (again, computer analogy).

This week has been an interesting one in the mind of RJA. I’m glad school is done and that my job is such that I don’t have to worry about it too much when I am at home. I am also glad to have the friends that I do who are around to do anything from distract me to talk to me, though I often don’t give them the opportunity to do anything more than the former.

Yes, this week has been an interesting one in the mind of RJA. There have been times when I haven’t been able to put my active thought in the background. It is, in itself, frustrating to be tired and laying in bed but to have your mind racing at speeds that I mentioned in my first paragraph. Try to tell a determined mind that “it doesn’t matter” and that “everything will be fine”–I have, and it doesn’t work. But I have a secret weapon; a weapon capable of universally destroying anxiety, fear, doubt, concern, and other thoughts that can drag you down.

Prayer. Sometimes the hardest part can be remembering this secret weapon in a mind otherwise consumed by other thoughts. But once you do remember it you can implement its use quickly. For various reasons I don’t often post about religion, and some of my readers who don’t share the same beliefs as I probably won’t “get” it. My intention here is not to convince those readers of anything; my intention is to share what prayer is for me.

Prayer calms me down. Prayer gives me a chance to share everything–all of my thoughts–with someone, even if He already knows what those thoughts are. Prayer reminds me of what really is important. Prayer gives me a feeling that nothing else can give me. Most importantly, prayer reminds me that everything really will be fine.

To anyone who has just received an e-mail from me that seems very late and currently out of context:

Rogers Wireless had a problem with sending mail (SMTP server) so that any mail I sent from my mobile phone over the past couple of days is just being delivered now. I, at least, am just receiving my test messages now. I personally don’t believe that the problem has been cleared up yet so expect to see a few more delayed messages today.

(And for those interested, I have since worked around the problem by using an alternate SMTP server, provided by Gmail. This does require me to consciously switch my “outgoing mail server” for each message sent, so it’s annoying and I sometimes forget.)

IGN gave Sneak King a 6.7 rating. I can’t wait to get home and play it.

[Edit: What a crappy post number 500.]

Time Magazine has named me Person of the Year. This almost makes up for us not being included in the three toasts.

I sat down on the couch to eat some chili (and all dressed potato chips) and turned on the TV. The cable receiver was tuned to one of the movie networks and Christmas with the Kranks is on. Having enjoyed the movie last year, I decided to keep it on, but I thought I would check to see if it is being broadcast on TMNHD–indeed it is. So I’ve been enjoying Christmas with the Kranks in HD.

I must be tired, however, as the broadcast is playing some weird tricks on my eyes. Whenever the focus changes mid-shot the image seems to stretch or skew in some way. There’s some bizarre zoom effects happening, too. I don’t think this is fine.

Early Sunday morning. I’m tired, but I can’t sleep. My legs feel as if they are asleep, though. Not as if they’re actually sleeping, as I would like to be, but as if they are suffering from neurapraxia. They clearly are not, though. Clearly to me, anyway.

My speakers are chirping due to radio interference from my mobile phone. I call this my “rhythm”.

And speaking of rhythm, tonight was my company Christmas party. The affair took place at the Crown Plaza hotel beginning with cocktails at 6, dinner at 7, and dancing to follow into the night. For this occasion I was wearing a black suit by Nautica, a blue dress shirt with a subtle white pattern, a white collar, and french cuffs from Donald Trump’s Signature Collection, and a pink tie with a blue circle pattern by Tommy Hilfiger.

With Dot by my side and a new haircut atop my head, I/we entered the ballroom at the Crown Plaza hotel with confidence, excitement, and authority. Before this we checked our coats, found the washroom, and queued for reasons unknown. After entering the ballroom we met B-rian, Mr. and Mrs. Oneel, Mr. and Mrs. Sofo (sorry–don’t know Mrs. Sofo’s handle), _dev_null and _dev_british, and Mrs. and Mrs. Foran Object. Some light banter was broken up by a desire to find our place, and eventually a call to sit down.

Dot was wearing a black dress by Dolce & Gabbana, black shoes by Yves St. Laurent, a small dog (pink in colour), and had a sequin-ish/sparkly purse by Jill Stuart. Frankly, I didn’t notice what anyone else was wearing.

Dinner was quite good. We started with a mixed greens salad and french dressing, followed by an apple soup, our entrees, and finally pasty wrapped vanilla ice cream with fruit pieces, whipped cream, and a strawberry drizzle. For our entrees, Dot had the rosemary roasted turkey with an apricot and herb stuffing, while I had the herb and dijon rubbed roast sirloin of beef with a forest mushroom sauce. Of note: the apple soup had me slightly fooled, and the desert was almost exactly what Dot wanted–almost. So, almost big points for the menu planner.

The DJ seemed to be catering to the older and less sober crowd, which had benefits (less RJ dancing) and drawbacks (less Dot dancing). The DJ did manage to temporarily redeem himself by playing a track by JT, which I probably made a mockery of with my “I’m a snoooooowman”-like dancing. I believe an AC/DC song started playing when we 86′d.

I feel as if the evening was a success, and that I could probably write more but now I think I’m tired enough to fall asleep. So I’ll post again tomorrow, or whenever I feel like it.

You may recall I recently shared my love for sweaters with you all. To my disappointment that post did not receive any online comments. Despite the lack of shared interest in the comfort of a sweater I was able to move on and post a few unrelated entries.

Well, I’m back with more sweaters. Today at work I queried Oneel for blog post suggestions–not that I have a need for suggestions but I was interested in what he might say. Oneel suggested that I make a list of the top five items that I would like for Christmas if money and viability were no object. I rejected that idea but then immediately followed up with my idea of posting about some of my favourite sweaters.

It just so happened that I had to do some laundry tonight. It also just so happened that I had my camera setup for a super-secret photo shoot. So while I sorted through my recently warn clothing that had piled up I picked out and folded up some of my favourite sweaters for the handsome photo (Figure 1). I admit, these sweaters did not get laundered today (they’re hand-wash only, so I like to get a few wears out of them between washings), but they did get nicely prepped for their next wearing or for a washing.

Figure 1 - Some of my favourite sweaters
On the left we have two black sweaters, the one at the top being a lightweight sweater and the one at the bottom being a medium to heavyweight sweater. The top sweater is very soft and can appropriately be warn over a dress shirt. The bottom is equally loved, serving a more general purpose and is the ultimate sweater for a last-minute rush out the door (everything goes with black).

Clockwise from there are two brown sweaters. These are both lightweight sweaters but are two highly varied shades of brown. The light-brown sweater has a collar so some might argue that it’s not a sweater; I would disagree. The light-brown sweater was a gift from my Great Grandparents, which makes it that much more special.

Moving on is another lightweight reddish-brown sweater. This is a sweater I bought this summer during a trip to Kingston while there was unseasonably cold weather. I think I mentioned this in a previous blog post, but I’m not going to bother finding that.

And finally we have the “one of these things is not like the other” sweater. This is a medium-weight sweater that was also a gift (from Mommy). In this case you can tell it was a gift because it is unlike most of the clothes I own (but still similar enough that you can see me wearing it). I do like this sweater a great deal, and it’s especially awesome because I would never buy it on my own. My favourite thing about this sweater: the baby-blue stripe. Way to be different, blue stripe!

I feel like putting all of these sweaters on right now and having a big sweater hug.